I've got Issues (that I care about)

I have a profile on Facebook. That's not new; I've had it for over a year now. In that year, a lot of things on Facebook have changed. The way it looks, the features and so forth. A few months ago they added these things called "applications." Things like photos, notes, "gifts" and groups fall under the category of applications. I had all of these things before they became applications so I simply left them, and refused to get any more. I thought (and still think, for the most part) that they are silly and unnecessary.

I use Facebook for its intended purpose: keeping in touch with friends. Every person that I am "friends" with on Facebook, I have had some interaction with in real life. It is a handy tool, but one I struggle with. I don't really like the idea behind it. I am trying to live in this century, in this internet information age while still maintaining a sense of who I am.

There are two points to this. The first is that I finally gave in and added a Facebook application known as Greenbook. Essentially, the company that started this makes a donation of a certain amount to offset carbon emissions based on the number of users that have the application. The idea is that computers release a certain amount of CO2 into the atmosphere when in use and by adding the Greenbook application you offset those emissions.

I added this because I believe very strongly in protecting the environment, but at the same time I struggle with the idea of the application because it is so passive. You don't do anything. There is no change in lifestyle involved in adding this application. You can still drive a big SUV, still turn your heat up higher instead of putting on warmer clothes, and so forth, but you have a clear conscience because you've added Greenbook to your Facebook profile.

This idea bothers me, but at the same time I am aware that in order for social change to happen, it must be easier for people to change than to stay the same, and this is definitely easier. On top of that, the application profile includes a number of simple ways to change the way you live in order to help the environment further. These last two points were how I convinced myself to add this application.

I should mention that I am not the posterchild for environmentalism. There are a number of things that I do that I shouldn't, but I am trying to fix them. This past summer I started riding my bicycle more, something that I hope to continue when the weather permits. I've also begun recycling much more, and I've stopped using disposable bottles. My sister just gave me a really nice, new nalgine water bottle for Christmas. As well as a pair of slippers so I can leave the heat down farther. When I use the bag lunch line at my school, I bring my own canvas bag and I have more bags to give to people who like mine.

Like I said, I'm not the posterchild for environmentalism, but it is an issue I care about, and I believe I came by it honestly. Growing up, my dad worked at the Minnesota Pollution Control Agency (mPCA). We celebrated Earth Day. When I was in grade school, I started a recycling program at the after school care I went to.

I'm not a big activist; I don't go out to protests or anything, but I do contact my state representatives about changing governmental policy to be more eco-friendly, and I encourage others to do the same. I try to live my life simply, and I'm always trying to find new ways to do so.

I've just been musing on all of this lately. Ever since I got that Facebook application.

Safe Under a Pile of Bricks

I was reluctant to get this. The last time I had a blog was early in high school. I think I got my first one just as I started Sophomore year and posted regularly until about halfway through Junior year. Maybe not even that long. Point is, I associated blogs with that time in my life, which was a weird time. Not altogether unpleasant, just not something that I'd be thrilled to repeat.

Why now? Probably a few reasons. I've been blogging for a website at my school called OleVillains.com. It's a joke about the student website, OleVille.com (people associated with my school are known as "Oles"), and I've enjoyed it a lot. It's not fantastic, and it's a total joke, but entertaining nonetheless, even if I'm the only one entertained by it. On top of that, finals for this semester are wrapping up, so naturally I'm spending my time writing about myself instead of actually studying.

Also, my best friend has a blog that I've taken to reading, and I enjoy seeing what he gets out of it. What I liked about my blog in high school was the fact that I could sort out my thoughts, and people would tell me if they were valid or not. I like to think that now I'm a lot more mature, and will get a lot of mature responses to what I think. I'd like to open up a dialogue. I'd like to know when I'm being an idiot so I can learn from it.

My last final (Introduction to Norwegian) is in about an hour and a half. Despite the studying I did do, I'm sure there's something I missed and I'll kick myself for overlooking it. Languages have never been my strong point. Partially because I have a hard time wrapping my head around a lot of the rules and ideas (a product of my upbringing and early schooling), and partially because I'm awful at studying. I was never really taught how to do it, so now I'm learning. It's a challenge, but one that I hope I'm living up to. I have two more semesters left before my requirement to graduate is fulfilled.

My other finals went fine. Two of them I actually enjoyed a little (I know - what?). I'm just forcing myself through these last few hours before I can pack up and go home to relax for two weeks. I've been ready to go home for about a month. Which is another reason I decided to create this.

This fall I've been struggling with feelings of being an "other" here. I don't want to sound like I'm whining; I'm well aware of just how blessed I am to have the friends I have here at school. I'm well liked, and I'm content. The problem is that I always feel a little bit like I'm the entertainment. There are times that I feel people are just curious about me, and hang out with me because they want to know what I'll say in certain situations, or about certain things. All of that is fine, but it creates a strange and sort of lonesome world. There's no flow of ideas back and forth.

It's something that I miss from home. No matter who I'm with at home, I feel like we're always playing off of each other's ideas. It's always, "Yes, that sounds fine but what about this?" I love to be around people who will take my ideas and make them better, and are open to allowing me to build on, fix, or alter their ideas as well.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not miserable here, and there are definitely people that consistently push me to try new things, but overall, I can feel the ideas stagnating in the back of my mind. So this is my forum for letting those ideas out, and giving them space to evolve. I'm looking forward to sharing it with people, both from home and school. I'm excited at the prospect of being surprised by people.

One last thing before I head off to cram some last minute Norwegian into my brain: I say that this is a forum for my ideas, but that's sort of glorifying everything. As I said before, I want to sort my mind out and let people see it. I won't force anyone to read this, and I'll probably only share it with a few people. And some days, I'll simply write what I'm feeling. I'm sure this will evolve ten times before I stop posting (or become a famous blogger).

Thanks.